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There are, perhaps, a half-dozen films I will watch time and again. One of those is Decoration Day, a 1990 Hallmark Special Presentation Movie for Television. It stars James Garner as Albert Sidney Finch, a retired Georgia lawyer, who’d envisioned spending his retirement in the company of his wife, fishing, and writing an anthology on Law. His wife, however, dies suddenly of cancer, a loss that drives him into cantankerous seclusion. When he reluctantly agrees to help an old boyhood friend, Gee Pennywell, a black World War II veteran from whom he’s been estranged for 30 years, it takes him on a journey that slowly brings him out of his shell. Throughout all of this, he has the advice, both solicited and unsolicited, of Rowena, the Finch family housekeeper since childhood, a part played to perfection by Ruby Dee.
Near the end of the movie, he comes to realize his own self-absorption and how little he has considered the circumstances of others, including Rowena. He says to her, “Rowena, you’ve always known the right thing to do, and the right time to do it. I don’t think I ever really thanked you for that and for all that you do.”
Apron-clad Rowena reaches out to gently touch his cheek and says, “Sure you have, Albert Sidney, you just don’t remember.”
I’ve replayed that scene dozens of times in my mind, the tenderness of it, the truth of it. Like Albert Sidney, I’ve skated through life flinging the occasional thank you over my shoulder as I let the screen door slam behind me on my way out to play. But Rowena smiled when I did so. There have been formalized occasions for thanks as we’ve gathered around the turkey-clad table or on our knees at church. But even then, my attention has often drifted to the pumpkin pie or the new dress I didn’t want to wrinkle. Rowena knew; she’d baked the pie and ironed the dress. And I know her; I know she smiled when she did it, thinking of me. I got older and things got harder. I messed up, but somehow came through due to advice from others—solicited and unsolicited. But mostly I just thanked my lucky stars and patted myself on the back. I grew up, but my childhood habits remained. I was grateful for basic needs being met, for I was always and truly busy doing important things that were mine to do. If anyone asked, I’d have told them I was grateful and I was, but like Albert Sidney, I was long on good intentions and short on follow through.
This is what I think, I hope, happens when we get to heaven. We have this sudden breakthrough of understanding and somehow stammer out, “Precious God, you’ve always known the right thing to do and the right time to do it. I don’t think I ever really thanked you for all that you have done.”
And God, wearing the most beautiful crisp, white apron, and smiling that great big, gorgeous God smile, will reach out a gentle hand, cup my cheek, and say, “Sure you have, Kathleen Mary, you just don’t remember. But I do.”
It was some seven centuries ago that the Dominican priest and mystic, Meister Eckhart, penned the words, "If the only prayer you ever say in your entire life is thank you, it will be enough."
Apparently, he, too, had an Albert Sidney moment when he recognized how little he knew, how little he deserved, any of the goodness that had ever come his way. In that moment, he also knew his utter dependence upon the kindness of God, a circumstance that is ours as well, these many years later.
Thank you is humility in its purest form. In that moment of genuine gratitude, we realize our place in the grand scheme of things. We remember which one of us is God. In that moment, we could tremble; we could be slain by realization. But surprisingly, there is only grace, pure and simple and sweet.
If the only prayer you ever say in your entire life is thank you, it will be enough. Amen. Amen. May it be so.
The above is my November gift to you to kick off this month of Thanksgiving. I pray for you the gift of awareness that you may take note of your many blessings, the gift of gratitude that humility may be yours, the gift of generosity that you may bless others, and the gift of goodwill, that we may all live in right relationship. A blessed and bountiful Thanksgiving to All! - Kathleen
Sacred Self, Sacred Community
A Spiritual Formation Program
As announced in last month's SCRIBBLES, I am happy to be among those on the team for the upcoming retreat Sacred Self, Sacred Community from Retreat, Reflect, Renew. Having partnered with Christine Jurisich before, I know how competent, caring, and Christ-centered this ministry is and highly recommend it to any of you who are interested in going deeper in exploring your life as a unique journey to wholeness in God.
NOTE: Early bird deadline is December 1st, plus scholarships and space are limited, so it is good to register THIS MONTH
Sacred Self, Sacred Community is being offered
online, January 17- May 23, 2026
and includes:
- Journaling on your own during the month
- Spiritual Practices suggested throughout in a variety of modalities and prayer forms
- Sharing on Zoom one Saturday a month, both in large group and within your own permanent small group--all led by trained facilitators in a nonjudgmental, nonpolitical environment
- Developing Relationships in optional mid-month Zoom gatherings and in written format over a private 24/7 platform
Connection - Confidentiality - Convenience
Use the button below to check out this opportunity. While there, you can also browse through the many offerings from Retreat, Reflect, Renew to see what is the best fit for you.
If we are talking about Thanksgiving, Christmas is coming up on us fast! If you have one or more youngsters on your Christmas list, a happy and convenient choice for them would be Terrance McPhee and the Toy Eating Tree. Please check it out at our website--the story, the backstory, the caterpillar, the plane, the resources for adults reading to a child: Click here:
You can also place an order for either softcover or hardbound by just clicking the button below:
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Contact Kathleen
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